Practicing Presence
This evening after a lengthy discourse on adolescent and young adult development I walked to my car with Kim from my class. At the beginning of the term we talked about what our "dreams" were and what we wanted to do. I shared about how I worked in a certain direction toward a "career" for a long while and was not sure if that is what I wanted to do anymore. I did not share specifics, as I try to avoid the instantaneous label that is place on people of ministry. People of ministry are the blacks of yesteryear. Heaven forbid you be a "christian" or a "believer" or a "Jesus-freak"...you are promptly placed in the category of "judgmental", Bush-voting, fundamentalist. I avoid this at all cost. I would much rather enter into a conversation with someone and be Jesus with skin on. I just love that term to describe incarnating ministry...it seemed so cheesy in YL at the time...but it is so applicable.Kim had shared her "testimony" with the class this evening about her coming into her own. She grew up in an unhealthy cultish (like really a christian cult) home. When she was 18 she moved to go to college and began to explore her sexuality and realized that she was a lesbian. She shared a bit about being disowned by her family and how her friends have become her new family. I was so moved by her raw emotion and honesty that I decided to tell her.
I told her how impressed I was and how I wish she wouldn't have been so hurt by people and that I was sorry that happened to her. Now I cannot explain this but there have been a few times where I feel like I should apologize for the hurt Christians inflict upon people...I guess trying to right a wrong. She has been asking me all term what it was that I wanted to do career wise since everyone else was specific...and I remained a mystery to her. I told her that I was in ministry for years and that I wanted to plant a church someday. I also told her that my dream was to provide a place for people to question, to serve, and to be themselves and love everyone equally...cause I think that is what Jesus did. I told her why I didn't share that with many people(she got it) and we ended up talking about life, God, and our beliefs for the next 20 mins.
She was so honest with me and I felt privileged to listen to her. She shared about her family, her being kicked out...I briefly shared about Erin and other people who think I have gone off the deep end. It was so neat...
I told her that we need to go for beer sometime(she and Jen love McMenamin's) so we are going to try and set something up next week.
I love love love being able to be with people! I also love that Jesus is giving me the ability to see people and listen.
Listening is the new preaching of today....Silence speaks so much louder than words.
posted by Kat @ 10:39 PM
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