Little Monsters
This morning Biz and I took Lily and Jake(the kids I nanny) to a parade and to the Beaverton Farmers Market. We sat and watched the fire engines with there blazing red lights and loud sirens go by and I felt so at peace. I don't know what it is about having the kids around but I always feel in my groove. Stella got her groove back by being hot and getting a hot guy, I get my kicks from spending time with two small mischieveous and bright children.When Lily is on my hip looking out into the world, her beautiful sometimes green eyes, staring in wonder and soaking in all her surroundings have to offer. She is still fearful of new situations and she buries her hand into my shirt and lays her head against my chest. Something really neat happens during these moments. It it as if for a moment there is a placidity in the air and all that is around is faded out and the moment is still-framed on the love that is present for that moment. It is as if there is nothing more beautiful than the caring of a child. For a moment to put the needs of someone else above your own, to make another feel warm and safe, is all that is present.
I am giddy and feel alive when I look down to see Jake with a two-inch circle of pink goopey saliva around his mouth from the Now or Later he was able to jimmy open while I was having my lovey moment with Lily. It is then I realized he is mid-candy binge that will later lead to him running around like a hamster on crack while eating his fingers and wiggling his head as if he were at a punk rock concert. Thank you God for baby wipes. Thank you God for the water and swiss grilled cheese sandwich I force fed him praying he would come down from his high before returning him to his father. Needless to say I loved every minute of it.
I love being apart of these little crack monkeys lives as the develop into people. I love that I get to see them on a daily basis, learning, growing, changing. It is the most beautiful experience of my life. I do not regret nor will I ever regret the life that I have chose. Sure it would have been easier to have quit and gone to school or quit and stayed living in the city but I would have been missing out on the most fun time I have had in my life. Seriously...it really is.
This life experience will continue definitely until next June, but eventually I will move on. I will start my own life, while will hopefully included little monsters of my own.
posted by Kat @ 5:34 PM
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