Depression 101
I get what it means when people talk about not being able to sleep, eat, or function like a normal person.Having your heart feel as if it being ripped out of your chest is good for the ass. Some people eat Ben and Jerry's. Not me. I just feel numb.
I sat in front of the T.V. tonight after crying and falling asleep for three hours. I was not really watching it...it was just on.
I can either sit at the computer or try to sleep but only wake up several times throughout the night like I have for the last two nights.
Moving will be a good distraction next week. Biz and I have to go to Home Depot to look at blinds and paint. I thought the kids were a good distraction at work. They are except for the times that I remember the thought I had a couple of weeks ago about how the baby's eyes change color like Carter's eyes. It made me wish our kids would have his eyes and how adorable that would be. A thought that used to bring so much joy is now so painful.
Today I would like my room to be a dark color that would make me want to sleep all day. I am so glad I have next week off to be depressed and watch T.V.
Oh and I will have my keyboard so I can play...that should be nice and depressing.
Okay this is just lame...I must stop this for tonight.
More depressing tales tommorow!
posted by Kat @ 11:47 PM
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